Friday, March 16, 2012

these days

These days life seems like it is just flying by. I hardly have time to sit down and breathe. Thank you for those of you who still faithfully check my blog. I am sorry I so often disappoint. I don't think going from 2 to 3 has been too difficult a transition...Polly is so easy. She sleeps, eats, poops and smiles. But what I do find difficult is just the management of all things. Am I loving all my children well in the day? Am I forgetting anyone? Am I sure Polly is in the car when we leave the house? (That's how easy she is....) Am I loving my friends well? Am I talking with my husband enough? Is there clean laundry to wear? (Thank you so much, Mom! Because of you, my children have clean underwear and ironed dresses!) What are we eating for dinner tonight? Is there milk in the fridge for tomorrow morning? Have I snuggled enough with Lucy? Have I talked enough with Huntleigh about her day? Did I remember to write down that appointment? Dentist appointments, doctors' appointments, allergist appointments, tennis lessons, 6-year well visit, 4-year well visit, 4-month well visit....don't forget to fill the car up with gas, pack lunches, remember what everybody likes, dance party with the kids, sing with the kids, pray for my kids, clean up the kitchen, mix the bottles, clean up, clean up again...why even bother cleaning up this time?! Work out, lose that baby weight, who am I kidding?! That baby weight is gonna hang on for awhile. Wear it proudly. Enjoy your baby. She'll be 1 in the blink of an eye.

When I sit down with a glass of wine at the end of the day I can't help but wonder if I've done anything well at all. My husband is patient and loving, picking up something for dinner on his way home as often as he needs to and he is quick to encourage me in this task of motherhood. I want to do everything perfect all the time, but it's just not possible anymore. It never was possible. It was just easier to maybe fake it. I'm so thankful for my three beautiful children. What I really want them to know at the end of each day is that I love them very much and I am proud of who they are all are. And this little kiddo: it seems like all I have of her are sleeping pictures. She does do a lot of sleeping...if you click on her pic, there are just a handful of other pictures on flickr and I will try to take time to get one with her eyes open!!

snuggled up


littlestreetfighter's Mom said...

sb! I have to admit that I don't check your blog much these days b/c i find there just isn't time, but I am always happy to see NEW pics! I so relate to this post..just wait, I have found school age soooo busy: performances, practices with sports, musical instruments, etc. phwew! struggling with looking everyone in the eye and giving an encouraging word. I have no doubt you are doing great! you are a very attentive person and I'm sure this carries over to your girls and man. i just may call you! love you tons! jd

SAN said...

Great post, Sarah. You're not alone in the struggle to balance life well. Some good days; some bad; some just...plain ole days. Looking forward to seeing you guys again whenever we get back that way.


syau said...

S - I love you!!! Love your blog (and yes, I do check faithfully :) ), and can feel your heart when I read it.

Can't wait to see you very, very soon and meet Polly. Hunts and Lucy have grown up so quickly!!!

love you - huge virtual hug from HK. Real hug soon.